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Tip #67: Herein we learn to avoid herewith (and also herein)

4/30/2015

Often inexperienced writers will select words to produce prose they think will be “elevated and enlightened.” But their arrangements show them to be more pretentious and pompous than elevated and enlightened. Very often, simple approaches make the most effective writing.

For example, consider herewith. The word sounds noble. So does its not-too-distant cousin herein. Wouldn’t using these words make the writer appear intelligent? And doesn’t that intelligence translate into professionalism?

Not always. In order for words like herewith and herein to sound intelligent, they must appear in very wordy sentences filled with equally “lofty” language. What results from the whole provides a much less effective vehicle for communicating what is often a simple message.

Take the example sentence in the graphic at top, for example. It sounds very “official.” But how does its effectiveness at communicating a simple message compare with this revision?

I grant you permission to perform the repair work listed on this work order and to use the necessary material. You may operate my equipment to test its performance. I understand that you will keep my equipment until I have paid for all repairs.

Doesn’t that shorter text sound more effective? It does because it is. Attempts to sound more erudite usually engender more confusion than they dissipate. Truly intelligent writers know that simple, direct writing often makes a more professional presentation.

So if you want your writing to communicate more professionalism, avoid “elevated and enlightened” language like herewith and herein. The image you convey respecting your organization and brand will be all the better for it.

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Tip #66: Keep outside of out of your writing

4/23/2015

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Last week I posted about personal preferences in writing and gave a great example in proven versus proved. Most choices in written English, however, don’t sit on the fence of effectiveness. They very clearly sit on one side or the other.

Take the expression outside of, for instance. In written English, the added and unnecessary preposition on the end (of) carries over from spoken English. While such a construction may find acceptability in spoken English, that preposition dangling on the end creates a redundancy which reduces the effectiveness of professional technical writing.

Since redundant words typically create less effective writing, experienced writers will take care to remove those extra words from their writing. Thus, the example sentence in the graphic above should be modified.

Attached outside of the heat affected zone, the bolted connection began cracking long before the weld repair occurred.

In addition, experienced writers will take care never to use outside of in place of aside from or except for. Writers who mean to say “aside from” or “except for” will use aside from or except for, not outside of. Again, this improper use of outside of has come from spoken English. But professional technical writers will conform to the conventions of written English and simply say what they mean.

However it may be used, keep outside of out of your writing. At best the expression is simply redundant. At worst it communicates your message less effectively. And a less effective presentation reflects poorly on you, your organization, and your brand. So always take the high road and keep outside of out of your writing.

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Tip #65: Sometimes you need not prove your preference

4/16/2015

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Lately I’ve been posting about little details that can make a difference in your writing. The distinctions between written English and spoken English provide a rich harvest of examples from which to pick.

Yet not all choices in writing are between more effective and less effective options. Sometimes writers can select an option not according to grammar or function but rather according to style. The options available are equally legitimate; the deciding factor is simply the stylistic preferences of the writer.

Proved and proven provide such an example. These two words are both past participle forms of the verb to prove. And although more writers usually select proved, proven is not a wit behind in acceptability. So either word will work equally well from a grammatical standpoint.

The example sentence in the graphic above uses proven. But if you prefer the more popular proved, the sentence would read as follows:

According to the evidence we have examined, our investigation has proved faulty manufacture to be the root cause of the failure.

Language is both an art and a science. And sometimes the art portion provides equally valid options to the writer. The only question then is one of personal preference.

Learning when to scrutinize and when to slide is part of becoming a better writer. Better writers produce better writing, and that helps the reader to connect you, your organization, and your brand with better images — better quality, better service, better professionalism. And that makes your business better for you.

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Tip #64: Kind of sort of don’t use kind of or sort of

4/9/2015

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Sometimes, attention to details requires a writer to exclude words altogether rather than include the correct or more appropriate ones. The phrases kind of and sort of provide excellent examples. To the experienced writer, they scream wordiness.

Wordiness will always diminish the professional image any writing conveys. That’s because the best writing always possesses clarity and conciseness. Of course, writers should seek first to be clear; the reader must receive the communicated message as the writer intended. But often, more than one way exists to achieve that clarity. That’s where conciseness comes in. Concise use of language conveys precision, a much more professional connotation than the sloppiness conveyed with using unnecessary words.

That’s what kind of and sort of are. They are colloquial phrases carried into written English from spoken English to mean rather, somewhat, or somehow. The imprecision of these words effectively communicates nothing. That’s why eliminating them altogether improves the professional image your writing conveys.

Consider the example sentence in the graphic above. Because kind of means rather, we can replace the one with the other. This produces

The design could not tolerate the rather adverse environment of the customer.

But that word rather doesn’t enrich the description or even enable it. What meaning becomes lost when we remove the word altogether?

The design could not tolerate the adverse environment of the customer.

No substantial meaning is lost by removing the qualifier. Compare this sentence with the original in the example graphic. This final sentence is a stronger one and conveys a more professional image because the writer minimizes the words needed to convey the message clearly.

Using kind and of together can sometimes be appropriate. Consider this example:

The engineers use a special kind of material in their process.

Here the words kind and of together do not mean rather, somewhat, or somehow. They act separately and independently in the conveyance of the writer’s message. In this instance such a construction is appropriate.

But whenever your writing uses kind of as a qualifying adjective to mean rather, somewhat, or somehow, avoid its use altogether. The same goes for sort of as well. Learn the differences between spoken English and written English, and eliminate unnecessary words from your writing. More precise writing is better writing that better communicates not only your message but also a sense of professionalism associated with you, your organizations, and your brands.

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Tip #63: Get on the proper use of onto

4/3/2015

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Little details often make all the difference. That’s why effective writers always look for the little details that can improve their writing. They know that good writing can make a difference.

One such detail is the difference between on and onto. On is usually a preposition meaning supported by, attached to, or located at. Onto is also a preposition with similar denotations. However, onto also connotes movement to a position or movement in an up-and-on fashion.

Consider, for instance, the example sentence in the graphic above. The word onto may sound correct but is really not the best choice in this sentence. Onto implies an in-and-on movement, but the sentence describes no such movement. Instead, the sentence describes an attachment between the apparatus and the support beam. Thus, the writer should rewrite this sentence.

The apparatus was attached on the support beam.

Alternatively, the preposition to could be used in placed of on.

The apparatus was attached to the support beam.

The use of onto here represents another instance of writing which fails to distinguish between spoken English and written English. Since either on or to would be appropriate here, somehow onto became acceptable as well. But while acceptable in spoken English, onto is not acceptable here in written English.

The key is to remember the up-and-on movement associated with onto. Onto implies a change of position. No up-and-on movement means no correct use of onto. And that means using another preposition like on or perhaps even to.

So get on the proper use of onto. Getting the little details right makes for better writing. And better writing makes a better presentation, which conveys a more professional image for you, your organizations, and your brands.

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Tip #67: Herein we learn to avoid herewith (and also herein)

Tip #66: Keep outside of out of your writing

Tip #65: Sometimes you need not prove your preference

Tip #64: Kind of sort of don’t use kind of or sort of

Tip #63: Get on the proper use of onto

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